Wednesday, August 20, 2008

13 Ways A Woman Knows She's Old

It isn't a specific age, it's a mental shift.
Here are 13 ways a woman knows she's old (can also be read as menopausal).
It's when:
  • the good looking guy in the truck takes a long look as he passes you and you flip the mirror down to see if you have something on your face or wonder if you left your drink sitting on top of the car.
  • you're more concerned with if you'll get too hot in that new outfit than if you'll look "hot" in it.
  • the GQ gorgeous construction worker takes off his shirt and you think "Boy, I bet he's hot out there." not "Man, is he HOT!"
  • the romance novel you're reading tells of the couple "making love all night" and instead of thinking "oh, ya!" you think "ya, right!".
  • and you realize sleeping all night (no trips to the bathroom or hot flashes) is way more appealing anyway.
  • you can't keep up with your own mood swings.
  • romance takes way to much planning to be romantic.
  • you know what black cohosh is and what it's for and that it isn't some recreational drug from the 70's.
  • you have a paper calendar, a calendar on your computer and a day-planner and you still need your daughter to call and remind you of any important obligations/events so you don't forget the. (Thanks Christy!)
  • the styles you wore as a teen are now back in style - and you can't believe you ever wore them.
  • your tweezers have become your "must have" beauty implement to one hair at a time ward off that mustache, beard, and/or unibrow.
  • you have feminine hygiene products in your purse, your desk and your car because you just never know.
  • the scales (which may or may not have been an enemy before) become your taunting antagonist as its number changes by the hour, let alone the day.

NOTE: For those of you who visited last week and left such kind comments, thank you. I seem to be narrowing in on the underlying source of my anxiety and that in and of itself is helping.


Lori said...

LOL...OK...then Im not too old yet. Thank God;) Happy TT. Great list!

YummY! said...

I'm acutally right there with you on the 2nd one, and I'm nowhere NEAR menopause yet.

Thanks for stopping by my TT.

bernieg1 said...

Hey I know some twentysomethings that look at life like that or think like that and they are not menopausal. I wouldn't worry too much - those yuppies are more burned out than any of us - they cannot even remember their name half the time without their Blackberry's. LOL! :)

You can visit my TT here.

perpstu said...

LOL! This list is hilarious! Thanks for making me giggle!

Happy TT!

Julia said...

hahahahahaha, thanks for this list, I laughed a lot :D

Happy TT and greets

msdebbiea said...


Qtpies7 said...

You are NOT making me feel better, lol. I am in adamant denial that I am in peri-menopause.

Peter Plum said...

You're only as old as you feel! Good list!

Happy T13!

Lucy said...

hahaha Im sorry to say, I can relate to all of these! thanks for the laugh

Yasmin said...

Happy TT and I turn 50 in 2 weeks...yikes...I guess its better than the alternative. ;)

storyteller said...

I’m not playing today … but I had to stop when I read your T-13 today to say thanks for the laughter. Well done!
Hugs and blessings,

mariah said...

Yep, I'm old!

Baby Mama {Soleil} said...

I'm only 27 and tweezers have been a must have (for all the reasons you mentioned) for me since I was a young teen-ager

bernie said...

I'm back, Thanks for visiting - Just FYI, I linked to your article from 13 Annoying Things On the Web

Gattina said...

I saw your link on Bernie's blog and it made me curious. Now I am still laughing it really is soooo true !

Clara said...

These are just too funny. And oh so true.

My 13 are here.